The Idea here, is quite upsetting to my taste. You see, I had a terrible time understanding that a man had to hunt for a woman, yet they were not supposed to be objectified, which means, they were a catch but not to be treated as one... aha.
Later I had to learn that yes you can kiss... but not too much, you can caress but just so much that flowers were good... up to some point and that no... it had no point in working in making myself better because in the end a woman's biggest dream was to tame and domain over a somewhat wild beast that her man was supposed to be. So the fact of knowing the Bible, trying to act according to the teachings of Buddha, learning and remebering the power of Tao, made no sense since, in the end, this battle for love meant the fact that I had to be a man full of flaws or I would be considered a freak of nature. I am sure to be far from perfect, but I know what my flaws are and how to control and improve them, ON MY OWN. Why is this a problem? So the fact is that one is to be sensitive... only as a show, because if not you're weak. It's not possible to lose, not even once or only in certain things... and God help you if in any possible quarrell against a woman you'd come winning. Oh dear Lord you'd pay for it. More than this you're supposed to know which battles to win, and which ones you should lose so she wins something.
It's always about that, the war of the sexes has shown me something, the one thing I came to learn is that I was still too innocent. That it is in fact a war, in which winner never takes all. In all truth you win, you lose, you keep going... but what puzzles me is... really and honestly what does all of this has to do with love?
For sometime I have been hurt, disappointed, heartbroken, due to having realized that, attraction, relationships and the way humans mate, wel,l just has absolutely nothing to do with love... and it really doesn't matter. To my dearest friends, please understand, it's been this what has sadden me in the opportunities we now all mock, I completely lost my innocence but until a couple years ago... and haven't really got over it... Le maître à tous.
